It’s good to sleep. The body really needs it to recuperate and feel whole again. My last 4 days in the US before the tour ended was crazy. We were in 4 separate places (LA, Vegas, Atlanta and Houston) in a span of 5 days. Now I am back at home in Manila sleeping on my bed and it feels good. I just hope I can get a decent amount of sleep before I leave again for the Middle East in 3 days!
Life for me has been hectic the past months. Home is where I put down and open my baggage. My solitude is a hotel room that keeps changing every so often. Inside it, I can write, enjoy some quiet, catch some rest or simply look out the window and watch life go by. When I am not in my room, I am around people, and more people and frenzied activities. Such is what life has been lately. And to all this, I am thankful even if sometimes, I complain. I try and flow at the speed of life.
‘Home in Houston’
In contrast, the past two days have been wonderfully slow and undemanding. I wake up when I wake up. There are schedules to do but I am not stressed out. Maybe I have just learned to deal with greater amounts of pressure and not be too bothered by them. But I know it helps that I have again been doing my zen sits which are hard to do on a regular basis when I am traveling.
Things that need to be done seem to fall into place easily. Two nights ago, I wrote a song that has to be submitted in study form by monday. Yesterday morning, I went to Ateneo to check on my new teaching schedule for this coming semester and fix a few kinks. In the afternoon, APO finished a recording for a UN project. Last night, I did some writing for my still-to-be-finished book. This morning, I awoke to Ananda’s delightful voice as she was trying to converse with her yaya during breakfast. When she saw me, she shouted ‘wowo’ (her attempt at saying ‘lolo’, I suppose) much to my immense delight. Everything seems to be in its right place and unfolding at the right time.
I have learned through years of meditation (off and on) that the world accommodates me best when I am centered. Or perhaps, it is the other way around and it is I who accommodates the world. Maybe doing one begets the other. I am not too sure. By accommodating, I mean an acceptance of whatever shows up–a conscious affirmation or saying of “yes” to life and its attendant excitement, surprises, routines, pain and pleasures. I am awake to all of it. Life is good, and when it is, it’s an easy thing to experience. And sometimes, I can say the same thing even when it’s bad.
But when I feel centered, I am comfortable with the simple reality that life is as it is, unqualified, neither good nor bad and not needing any labels or spin to be appreciated. As Desiderata puts it, “no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should”.
Simply put, when I am accepting of myself, the world seems to reciprocate the gesture. It’s like there is no separate world and no separate ‘I’. Maybe, the song is correct. We are the world!